“Forget what should be remembered and remember what should be forgotten”
It doesn’t take much to see through a doctor’s intentions. Yesterday I sat defenseless on the operation table. My dentist, Dr. Holiday, asked me if I ever had any cavities
It is debatably a pleasure to announce that I, Randall D’Anderson Beans, have been named the next Dean of Yale College. You students may refer to me as Dean Beans
I was at the office furiously finishing up my article on the Senate elections so I could attend my colleague’s Halloween party, when my boss beckoned me into his office
From my short yet renowned tenure running the Fortune 500 lentil farm Beans, Inc., I’ve acquired a wealth of knowledge on how to properly oversee a successful business. Skeptics may
Like most in the developed world, you probably awoke on Christmas morning as a child with a feeling of innocent excitementJolly Ol’ St. Nicholas delivered your long awaited gifts, implying
Professor: *tapping fingers on desk* So I think you all know why you’re meeting with me today. Athletes: *suppressing a smile* Nope… Professor: It is extremely suspicious that every single
As the infamous Yale paintball onslaught continues, our watchful protector Chief Anthony Campbell has sworn that he is using the full might of the police force to stop this terrorism
Sometimes when I’m twenty hours into my CPSC 323 pset and my code still doesn’t work because I decided to risk it all and skip office hours that week, my
The Murray dining hall manager exposed a secret cardboard-box resale scheme orchestrated by Yale Hospitality—in an attempt to finance an Exec-board spring retreat to Majorca. The finding explains the new
