“Forget what should be remembered
and remember what should be forgotten”

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Orange Chicken

Devonte Montigo February 5, 2023

Jeremy walks up to the Panda Express counter. The orange chicken glows like a beacon calling his shackled soul forward. He tastes the sweetness already. He licks his lips and

Chat Gé-pé-teé

Ms. Terry February 5, 2023

In a surprising shift from previous school policy, the Spanish department is now encouraging the use of ChatGPT by their students to write their essays. They do not need to

Garfield

Maximiliano de Habsburgo February 5, 2023

Something is rotten in the state of Denmark. For how are we to make ethical and moral sense of the feline phenomenon known as Garfield? Garfield hates Mondays, but what

OpenTable Reservation at olea

Maximiliano de Habsburgo February 5, 2023

          First name: Maximiliano Last name: de Habsburgo Phone number: (505) 842-5662 Select an occasion (optional): Birthday / Anniversary / Date Night / Business Meal /

A Charitable Endeavor

Randy Beans February 5, 2023

Thank you to those who took the time to contribute to my newest project: the Beans Organization for Orphans, Toddlers and Youth (B.O.O.T.Y). This is my first charity, and I

Confidential Memorandum

Tyler Durden February 5, 2023

Dear Bruce,     We on the Peabody board have heard some complaints recently regarding the Peabody’s much anticipated new initiative “Night at the Museum: Dinosaurs Come to Life”. One

An Ode to Athletes in One Part

Tyler Durden February 5, 2023

Professor: *tapping fingers on desk* So I think you all know why you’re meeting with me today. Athletes: *suppressing a smile* Nope… Professor: It is extremely suspicious that every single

Opinion: I Went Home for Spring Break

Female Writer February 5, 2023

Puerto Rico. Miami. Mexico. What do all of these places have in common, besides manatees? They are hotspots for overzealous, dehydrated Yale students on spring break. There is a 77%

Covid Log #3

Female Writer February 5, 2023

Day #0 Just days before my favorite little underground cooler-than-you indietronica-alt-rock band comes to campus, I test positive for COVID. Although my grief is overwhelming, I will try to remain

When I Lost Service for a Day in Arizona

Patty Kayk February 5, 2023

Dad: son. please reply to mom as soon as possible. I can’t see your location anymore on our family location tracking app and your mother is worried sick. are you okay? let me know.

A Conductor

Randy Beans January 15, 2023

A little-known fact about ol’ Randy here is that I was once in charge of driving trains. I don’t mess with them metal devils anymore ‘cause of what happened after

Private Health Insurance

Randy Beans January 15, 2023

Private health insurance is a big problem. It incentivizes doctors to recommend expensive, elective procedures to their patients in order to recoup more of the coverage costs. Take what happened

“Forget what should be remembered and remember what should be forgotten”

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